Little quirks you miss….

I recently was graced with the company of my grandparents and my mother. Each affectionately known as granny, paw paw and maw. Maw is my mother. My son’s named her that. It’s original version was “ole maw”. If this doesn’t reiterate how southern I am I don’t know what could. They flew from TN to stay for seven days. It was an especially challenging trip for each of them. My grandparents being 83 and 70. Paw Paw has several health and physical limitations as well as granny who is the primary care giver and being outside their home posed a much harder time for everyone. My mom’s challenge being that she is and has for most of her life been single having to provide for herself. So taking time off from work and home is hard for her.

So anyways they came in to see the kids and to celebrate birthdays as they were all around the time of their visit. And the most important date being my daughter’s baptism. Our religions are different vastly but very respected. We have all agreed to see what happens in the end and support what we do share.

As they stayed for seven days I found it was quite easy to return to old routines. Paw Paw sitting in the recliner watching Fox News and people coming and sitting with him periodically. The kids running a muck and him being completely content to watch and laugh. My mother and I on the internet shooting the breeze and my granny sitting on watching and participating where she understood.

But as the days progressed I couldn’t help but take notice of those quirks you forget and the changes of myself and family. I woke up early one morning and heard my mother clearing her throat. A noise I could recognize like a favorite song. I could just see her reading a book pushing her cheek in with her knuckle chewing on the inside. I peeked in and I was right. My paw paws greatest fear is always the same.  Are we took care of, do we have enough to eat, how are the kids doing in school. All justified care being the Patriarch and only father I have.

And then there was granny. I found myself many times in her company alone. She shared her many ailments, fears, complaints and lamentations. At times she never really had anything positive to say. However I had to take stock of the fact that if we weren’t related and were closer in age even perhaps this would be like the reunion of old friends. Her release being a build up of fears over the period of a long time and not having that person she could trust to share them with. And with that I realized I had done the same thing with my mother as well. The words were different, the tones and language were vastly different but the situations the same. The needs and the dynamics similar.

So how many young women can tell you that they’re their mother and grandmother’s best friend? And how many can say they are viceversa? I don’t know. All I know is the life I know and the women that shaped the clay I came out as. When I say that I was raised by proud southern matriarchs I not speaking fiction.


~ by Bri Clark on October 8, 2009.

2 Responses to “Little quirks you miss….”

  1. Bri, I’m so glad you shared this!!! Great insights!!

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